Primark

Down to Primark in Broadmead, Bristol yesterday to buy jeans. A year after it had become necessary, I finally downsized my trousers from 36" waist to 34" waist; an end to looking like a silent comic.

For fun I tried on an 'ultra skinny' pair - could barely get them on - and in the mirror saw an older version of a very garrulous comic.

But no, I am not Russell Brand's embarrassing dad: they went back on the rails.

As we walked around Cabot Circus, I remarked to Clare that something very strange is happening: almost none of the shoppers we saw were fat ...