Mosquito

Last night, just past midnight, I was hunting down a mosquito in the bedroom with the high-voltage executioner. It had been making those high-pitched, whining, low-passes over me in bed; Clare merely cowered beneath the duvet.

We have plenty of spiders on the ceiling and in the high corners of the room. I was shouting at them, "Hey, slackers. Do your job!"

On my second foray I spotted the damn thing on the ceiling directly above where my head lies. It was duly incinerated with 20,000 volts.

The Executioner

In response to our little mosquito problem, Clare has retrieved her Christmas present of The Executioner.

The Executioner

Powered by two AA batteries, this delivers of the order of 3,000 volts to any hapless flying insect and can also be used when they perch in casual fashion on the walls. A brief spark and they fry.

I wondered what would happen if you touched the grill yourself (it does say not to do this). Mindful of electroshock torture and tasers, I debated wimping out for a while before finally pressing the button and proceeding to zap the side of my hand (this guy was braver).

There was a bright blue spark and a sharp zapping noise - and I have to say it hurt a bit. More like a burn than an electric shock: but I wouldn't fancy prolonged contact.

Here's a guy ('Backyard Armory') showing you how to convert The Executioner into a stun gun.




This is illegal in the UK. Having watched the video I immediately noted some design improvements: the ends of the steel probes should be filed to points both to improve penetration and to increase the electric field (and therefore the applied voltage); also, his assembly is not very robust and would probably just break if used for real - the high-voltage circuitry should be embedded within a much more rigid container.

Well, we talk big but so far not a single flying thing has been harmed by The Executioner!

Mosquitoes in Somerset

Love that dopplered hum as you lie awake at 2 am. That intimate, penetrating whine as - invisible - it skims past your ear. Why doesn't it attack? There's an exposed wrist, an overheated ankle carelessly protruding from beneath the duvet. Surely it's hungry?

Silence now .. but you'll be woken again soon and it'll be lumps in the morning.

An unwanted house guest

A consequence of the mild weather and the flooded Somerset levels. The mosquito population has begun its exponential expansion and already here in the City of Wells our house has been invaded. Where's the spray?
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I managed to leave my mobile phone at my mother's house in Bristol yesterday. So no calls or texts for a week: email, skype or the fixed line work.
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UPDATE: 9.30 am this morning.

Splat! the flyswatter clobbers a big, juicy mosquito high up on our bedroom wall, leaving a blood-red smear. Clare's, not mine - and definitely not a room 101 situation ('do it to Julia, not me!!') ...